Despite the fullness and the heaviness I feel because of the huge amount of feelings within me .. I still feel empty from within .. I still feel fragile and so weak..

It is a very awkward thing .. to feel two opposite things at the same time..

I am tired of writing down my feelings and hoping that this may make me feel a little bit better .. because it doesn’t .. 

I am tired of wearing my smiley mask all the time and pretending to be fine and perfect .. 

I am tired of all of that but I still have to do it .. and it is killing me .. to know that I have no other choice .. 

I hate the ups and downs that are happening to me .. they are driving me crazy .. one day I am okay .. the next I am crying for no reason .. it’s insane .. 


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